Forgiveness

I forgive you. I start with that to say that I am done with the pain and the anger. I forgive not for you, but for me and my sanity. You can no longer hold space in my place of peace and tranquility. I prayed on the answer to the pain that was consuming and overwhelming and what God told me was a revelation that has been written for centuries, something he did for me even though I do not deserve and nor do you, but on a real note I forgive you. No, I do not forget the pain. I do not forget the anguish. I do not forget the depression. I learn from them and move on. If I allow this to continue, then you will always keep in the this horrible space, so like I said I forgive you. I forgive you for not trusting me when I needed just that the most, when I bared my soul to you and told you the truth of my circumstances and you turned your back that is your choice. You deal with it, because your monkey? I won't bare it any longer. I am moving further from what I was, what we were and I know now that you can't be loved by a person on your sheer will. I never lied, I never cheated and maybe one day you will believe it, but if not that is your problem to work through not mine. It is time that I shine. I have made my progress and I am doing my best to do good things. I hope you too will realize that your material and money worship will be an unsatiable thirst and only one well will quench the pain you hold so deeply and dear to your heart. If it wasn't me it would have been someone, so instead of why me, I guess for you it was best that it was me. I will not get a band of brothers together for revenge, because you see revenge is not mine. It is a dish best served cold and I do not want to be cold. I am a warm and loving person who deserves better than to be doubted and mistrusted. So, farewell and I pray that one day you will come to the light and fight the demons that are encompassing your life.